Empowering Birth Stories: How Doula Support Made a Difference for a Fourth-Time Mom and Her Baby Girl

Thank you to mom Christine for sharing your incredible birth story with us!

Naples family of five after doula support

"I found out I was pregnant when I was really busy. Life was going a million miles a minute—I was teaching full time, I had 3 busy boys, a full schedule, and a seemingly full life.

I was so busy, in fact, that when received a jury summons, there was no way I could consider skipping work to fulfill my civic duty (I realize my error, and I’m sorry). In short, I lied. I reported to the court that I was pregnant (it was an available option for an excusal), and that was that. I reported to work instead, and then 2 days later, I found out that I was actually pregnant.

I thought I was in a new era in my life, one that was free from diapers and baby gear. My youngest was 6 years old, and I was thrilled with the new freedom that comes with one backless booster instead of 3 full-on car seats. I thought wrong, and at first was in a bit of denial. I couldn’t believe we were actually

starting all over again. And then, as time went by, and as I became more and more pregnant by every busy day, it started to sink in. Every time I felt those tiny kicks and sometimes painful punches from this little baby, I loved her more.

We were having a girl. Our first girl!

It wasn’t until further along in the pregnancy that I remembered I had to birth this girl. My last delivery was awful - I still believe I’m traumatized by the experience. I couldn’t walk or sit for weeks after, and I swore I’d never ever go through that again. Yet, here I

was, about to go through it. Again. To make matters worse, my husband had made a prior commitment to being a groomsman at his best friend’s wedding, in California, when I was scheduled to be 37 weeks. And to make matters EVEN worse, every time I had an ultrasound, doctors at my appointments would insist that I get induced because my baby was measuring large - like 10 pounds large, or larger, and that this delivery would definitely be my most complicated yet.

Because of the circumstances, my out of control anxiety, and the insistence of a dear friend of mine, I decided to reach out to Mindful Birth Services and Doula Care. I spoke with Christine, who probably heard a voice on the phone that belonged to someone about to cry. She was unbelievable from the first moment. Not only did she calm me down, she managed to hear my specific needs and connected me with the angel that helped me deliver my sweet baby girl—Tara.

I knew from the first time we met that I’d be okay as long as Tara was with me. She probably thought I was a nutcase. Regardless, going though my history and birth plans (fingers crossed) put me at ease. I learned so much — she is an absolute wealth of knowledge. I am forever grateful for her quiet confidence as mine slipped away as time drew nearer to meet my girl.

The night before baby girl’s birthday, I went into labor. The waiting room at the hospital was packed, and we waited in triage while Tara waited in her car for what seemed like forever, until we were admitted into Labor and Delivery.

When we finally were, I couldn’t help but notice the difference a doula makes in the labor process. While my husband was always a calming presence for my first three deliveries (he made it in time for this one, by the way!), it was so helpful to have Tara in the room advocating on my behalf for the things that she knew I wanted (since we had discussed everything prior). From past experience, once labor began and pain and anxiety were heightened, I always gave up asking for my own comfort - I just wanted to get the baby out. This is where Tara shone. Lights were dimmed, classical music was playing, the scent of lavender wafted through the air. For brief moments, I may have convinced myself I was at the Four Seasons instead of an operating room at Health Park.

Tara’s experience and confidence gave me the strength that I needed at the perfect moments. There were times when I was absolutely certain that I had nothing left, but somehow her whispered affirmations gave me that extra boost I never knew I needed: “You’ve got this.” She even has a magical bag with all the things a woman in labor could ever need. At one point, I felt hot - before I knew it, a fan was blowing in my face. I started feeling reflux - is that peppermint? You have to believe me: Tara is pure magic.

In retrospect, this delivery was by far the most calming, the most in-touch-with-my- body I have had. I’m six years older than I was during my most recent delivery, yet this experience far exceeded my expectations for a delivery by a woman of advanced maternal age with an expected 10 pound baby. Baby Charlotte Jane ended up being 7 pounds 7 ounces, a petite peanut, and a perfect, calm angel.

After delivery, Tara stayed with us until we were transferred to our room. She showed up at our home for postpartum care, and I will swear to my grave that those naps I was able to take while she watched the baby and did my laundry were the best I’ve ever had. I don’t know what it is, but Tara has this uncanny ability to calm me down and convince me to let go, even for brief moments, of my very Type A personality.

I felt genuine sadness on Tara’s last postpartum visit. It was like Mary Poppins was leaving. Now, 6 weeks later, I can confidently say that the whole experience since calling Christine was absolutely transformative. I have healed so much more quickly with more confidence in my ability than I ever had. Sometimes, during the witching hour, when all hell breaks loose, or when my inexplicably busier life goes a little more nuts than usual, I can still hear Tara whispering “You’ve got this,” and so far, she’s been

right."

Authored by Christine, mother of four